Arrividercci, 2006

I am so very content right now. Christmas vacation is, I have decided, a combination of all of my most treasured things and people. Not only do I get to hang out with my family and relatives nearly 24/7, but there is much opportunity for enjoyment of movies, art-goodness, theological and philosophical conversations with Jess, Bluth family hilarity, traipsing around outside, and so on. To add to the fun of this Christmas, I am recuperating from my fortnight-long illness in my favourite convalescence modus operandi: with a raspy voice. On Christmas Day, I sounded strikingly like Barry White, while my voice transformed to that of Adam Sandler’s by Boxing Day, and for the past two days I’ve borne a strong vocal resemblance to a witch. While my throat is not very happy, and turns red periodically, having a croaky voice makes for great fun. I sang along to “I Wanna Grow Old With You” about 25 times on Boxing Day (Jess will attest to this; it was on repeat for the whole present-wrapping and outfit-deciding ordeal that morning). If my voice ever becomes permanently damaged, as my dad’s was many years ago, I would make a great Adam Sandler fill-in. Sounding like a witch has its benefits too, as I have discovered. I get loads of sympathy from customers at the café, and find a great deal of amusement in calling drinks out. Because my throat is so clogged, the air being forced out by my diaphragm often doesn’t make it out until I’m part way through annunciating a word. For example, when I called out mochachinos today, instead of exclaiming “Mocha!” into the seating area, I ended up declaring “Caaa!” several times. It was awesome, I assure you.

Perhaps the loveliest thing bout the additional leisure time I find myself with in these weeks off of school is the amount of time that I have to simply laze around and think at night. I’m going to sleep in until at least 9:00 tomorrow morning, and can stay up late reading books, doing devotionals, and pondering nihilism and love. My journal is full of page of Christmas-thinking, and I’ve found lots of issues to consider over the last while. I’m currently reading Hotel New Hampshire, What’s So Amazing About Grace, Velvet Elvis, The Conqueror’s Wife (thanks Jess!), and am going through Romans in my devos; it’s all terribly good stuff. However, I don’t quite feel like transcribing notes from my journal right now, so I’ll keep this entry as a meandering and topic-less one, and leave thoughtful writing for next week. If my grandpa were watching me write this, he would inevitably mention that I won’t write another blog entry until next year. I love my grandpa especially for his reliable excitement over his ability to remark that he won’t see us until next year, or that we wont go to church again until next month. His joy in saying these sorts of statements nearly rivals the thrill he gets from puns, and following up every pun he ever makes with the sentence, “English is a funny language.” I’m glad that God made grandpas.

My family and some friends watched The Good Shepherd this afternoon, and it was stunning. It’s currently at the top of my list for Best Film at the Oscars. Not only was it extremely well-written and excellently acted, but the cinematography was beautiful, particularly for what I assumed would be a basic spy movie. There was great depth in the script and plot, and the characters were complex and relevant. I have a penchant for movies that make use of symbolism and subtlety, and this one had especially metaphoric and nuanced moments. On the topic of film, my dad got the Babel soundtrack a couple of weeks ago, and it’s wonderful. Gustavo Santaolalla wrote the soundtrack for Brokeback Mountain, 21 Grams, and Motorcycle Diaries among others, and the music for Babel does not disappoint. Other recent music excitement has been derived from listening to a streamed version of the forthcoming The Band tribute compilation, Endless Highway. Of note is Jack Johnson’s cover of “I Shall Be Released.” It is, I daresay, my favourite Jack J song of all, and is almost as great as My Morning Jacket doing The Band songs. If I’d been born in another decade, I suspect that I might have been quite enamoured with Robbie Robertson, partially because of the fantastic-ness of his name.


Alluding to my previous mention of my grandpa’s keen observation of the upcoming transition into 2007, I am rather thrilled about New Year’s being nigh. I think I’ve blogged previously about my love of fresh starts, and how this is mirrored by the human desire for redemption, and God’s gift of grace. I really do enjoy beginning something anew, and of course January 1 is synonymous with having a clean slate. This past year has been full of twists and turns, and I’ve enjoyed it immensely. While school isn’t quite as fun as it has been in past terms, I can’t complain too much. I’ve been blessed by the community at McKernan over the past 12 months, and am happy to feel more at home in our new church. It feels like my family has found its groove again, and while we are a busy family, we mostly like the busyness (though my dad really wishes he had more time for baths, being outside, and reading). It’s been a year of kind of re-evaluating what I think about God and life, and while most of what I’ve felt for years now remains in my set of beliefs, it’s good to know that I’m not stubbornly believing what I do out of close-mindedness. I’ve felt comforted to get to know people who have similar perspectives to mine, and have loved being challenged by people who see things differently, or perhaps just think that I’m crazy (I don’t think I’ll ever forget the night of the Cait-smoking-marijuana discussion; there were even waffles and hot chocolate at Denny’s).
















I read an article recently wherein the author wrote about how she was exactly where she wanted to be in life. She had a great boyfriend, loved her job, felt secure in her values, and had many passions that brought joy into her life. I think it’s wonderful that she had achieved what she wanted to in life, but I’m not sure that I’ll ever be in that same position. While I’m perfectly content with where I am, if I wanted to remain where I was, I think that would be allowing complacency to breed stagnancy in my life. I feel blessed with my life right now, but I know that I still have much maturing, learning, and journeying to do with God. It’s tempting for me to be happy with how far I’ve come in my faith, and settle with where I am in my life. But, at least in the light of my walk with God, life is a journey that isn’t completed until the fat lady sings and my heart stops beating. I’ll always have more to learn, faults to improve, people to love more, intimacy and dependency to build with God, and ungodly things to let go of. At times, that can seem overwhelming, but it’s a huge relief for me to know that God loves me so patiently that he’ll wait and walk alongside me while I stumble along this journey. I hope that for you, dear friends, the year 2007 is one of growth, adventure, laughter, health, learning, and joy.


Favourite Moments of 2006 that I Can Recall

• celebration of Grandma and Grandpa’s 50 years together
• beating Mr. Schindel in the City Hall Fountain race, and then forcing C&C friends to endure Brokeback Mountain
• skiing without crashing once
• football at McKernan Park
• commemorating Rob’s leaving Edmonton with ice cream and chicken ball flinging, abandonment of me in the river valley, and Dusty’s “some clippers” statement (I had gone ~50 hours without sleep)
• agonizing over Citadel tickets with Caitlin in Steeps
• Break Forth with Donald Miller, Joyce Heron, and K.P.
• Canada’s Olympic d-domination in Torino
• seeing Death Cab and Franzy Panzy live
• Steeps “study” sessions
• improving my cooking skills significantly
• mattress struggles and “good competence” with Crystal
• the Oscars, despite losing the winner-prediction game
• the C&C Retreat in January
• gnoming with the guys for Larry and Konrad
• watching the Oilers’ playoff excellence with friends and family, and braving the crowds on Whyte
• riding on top of Brock while he moved slowly
• exploding lighters in Three Hills
• totally filling the hot tub at Allan’s acreage
• making the ghoulish Quinzhee with Jenn
• “The Cube” and the Hoff at Ashlee’s Christmas party
• observing the evolution of our family’s robot
• small group nights (especially ones with hair-free cookies)
• the C&C photo rally
• Google and YouTube fun and family functions
• building the snow fort with Jay Jay
• throwing a bowling ball backwards
• escaping Sherry
• my three-legged chair at the BBQ at Dusty’s
• the Mother’s Day brunch (mmm…. Egg’s Benedict…)
• Andrew’s always silly-fun dinner parties
• watching Talladega Nights while completely sleep-deprived
• the kitty-cats at Allan’s acreage
• volunteering at Head Start
• one-skate skating at the retreat
• being a gangsta and visiting horses with Crystal Whistle
• successfully living without La Familia for a month
• throwing cucumbers at Ben at the Kinsmen picnic
• making Jill’s birthday cake
• collecting pinecones with Bethany of Gesthemane
• the great workshops and concerts at the Folk Fest
• megaphone adventures with Mike et al.
• finding Darwin the Camera photo fun with Amy-Lynn
• back to school adventure day with Mom and Jess
• “turban time” with Nicole
• last day of classes mania with Crystal Whistle and Raw-Buh
• The 88 and Matty Costa at The Powerplant
• Mike’s amusing pilfering at Red Robin’s
• football games with Jess, Mom, and Dad
• Canada Day fireworks with the C&C crew and discussion of evangelism tactics
• meeting Fred and Sally the beavers
• the Government Park picnic with the Rinases, Anne, Tim, and my grandparents
• pouring a pitcher of water on Rob in my basement and then spraying him and Crystal with my garden-hose (sooo fun, until my board game was water damaged)
• ice battles and fun with Ross at work
• the Anne of Green Gables marathon with Jess
• pretty much every second of the Whistler trip
• hearing about Sarah Jane’s love life
• making smores and melting my shoes at Hawrelak Park
• Luke’s polo shirts and his song about “aplomb”
• late night chats and giddiness with Crystal
• gleaning music knowledge from Barista Chase
• Roman Candle war in Three Hills (in which I did not participate, of course)
• C&C Pizzazz Contingency with Andrew “Protestant” Browne
• drives through the country at night
• law and culture conversations with Corrinne
• the laziest pillow fight ever in Three Hills, and the subsequent water fight
• NEW YORK CITY

Things Learned in 2006

• sometimes the Eskies don’t make the playoffs
• it’s OK to not always be right
• periodic time alone is vital to my sanity
• Song of Songs isn’t actually so silly (alliteration!)
• loving God comes before loving others
• jealousy is a truly vile and insalubrious sentiment
• Conservative Christians are more like me than I once thought
• being ideological in my beliefs is imprudent
• I can no longer take my health for granted
• I think I could live in Edmonton for the rest of my life
• being loving doesn’t necessarily mean being a patsy
• cultural enjoyment isn’t ever worth being snobbish
• family is inestimably great and important
• Jack Layton has wonky ideas sometimes
• I still miss my old church
• I love my new church
• feeling guilty about awkwardness is silly
• time is precious; it passes by insanely quickly nowadays
• happiness is not my purpose in life

Potential Resolutions for 2007

• drink lots of water and eat more apples
• sleep slightly more regularly (Mom, this does not mean you should nag me!)
• Bible in a year
• bring amigos to church/C&C
• walk in the river valley twice a week
• sponsor a Compassion Child by myself
• obtain a driver’s license (for real this time)
• initiate a daily internet usage limit
• either use the treadmills at school regularly or take Yoga this term (with Caitlin?)
• make more miniature films
• have green tea or rooibos instead of Earl Grey
• love more
• carpe diem

P.S. In case it is unclear, the picture mosaics are of my favourite memories of this year. They kind of make this blog entry hideous because they're so overwhelming visually, but I quite like them, so I'm sacrificing this entry's prettiness for the sake of my happiness. Also pictured (inset with the first blurb) are my new shoes. They are gold and shiny. They cost $45 on sale at Gravity Pope. I am a super-shopper.

P.P.S. I don't have to work tomorrow! I have all tomorrow to see family, shop, walk, and read! Hurrah!!!

Things Superficial and (At Least Slightly) Meaningful

I do not purport to make any sense at this point in time. I haven’t eaten very much, and tiny little beasts called viruses are currently attacking my body, but in the absence of school, I have a craving to write at the moment. Tonight my annual birthday bash took place, and it was a grand occasion consisting of much laughter, conversation about insect-murdering fungi, and celebration of Leonard Cohen’s singing. I’m really terrible at not gushing about my family, but I’ll refrain from too much discussion of how they’re my favourite people in the world. (But, just for the record, they are my favourite people in the world. I have so much respect, gratitude, joy, appreciation, and love for them. I’m pretty lucky that the coolest people in the world are my family members. OK, blathering flattery done.) While my family doesn’t have to buy me great presents in order to win my affection, they certainly do get bonus points for picking out some rather awesome gifts. On Monday, prior to my infection of the Virus of Unpleasantness, I was the recipient of a beautiful 30 GB iPod named Botolf and an accompanying case depicting two turntables. Pretty stellar. Subsequently, at this evening’s fête, I was made the owner of some fine poetry, an amber necklace, some incredibly amazing vintage vinyl (Leonard Cohen! Beach Boys! Simon and Garfunkel!), and a Polaroid camera. I have wanted a Polaroid for quite some time now, and can’t wait to get started on photo-taking adventures with Galileo the Polaroid; the colours that turn out on Polaroid film are incomparable. I do realize that it’s kind of ridiculous that I enjoy these material things so much, and I’m pretty sure that Jesus wouldn’t focus nearly as much attention on gifts as I do. Hopefully I’ll use these gifts to appreciate human creativity, God’s creation, and the beauty of art, music, and poetry. I think I’ve mentioned in the past a Bible study that my small group last year did on joy, and I do think that a certain enjoyment of the “stuff” of life helps me to acknowledge all the cool stuff that God’s created and hopefully allows me to focus on the awesomeness of all that He has made. Still though, it’s important for me to ensure that my love of iPods, books, and cameras never rivals my love of others and of God, which is something that is often tempting to do in our capitalistic society. As Richard Wagner said, “joy is not in things, it is in us.”

As aforementioned, I’ve been strangely sick since the evening of my birthday, and was especially ill yesterday after my exam and while shopping with Crystal. Luckily, Crystal took me home early from our Christmas mall excursion, and I managed to make it to the bathroom before I lost my breakfast (and lunch and dinner). I know that it’s kind of awful to ponder the subject of vomit, but I think there’s something kind of wonderful about vomit. Although Jess is horrified when I mention to this to her, the feeling experienced after some cathartic upchucking is quite lovely. After a few hours of nausea and anxiety about being sick, literally purging oneself of whatever was inducing the upset stomach is such a relief. While the catharsis itself is extremely disagreeable and humiliating, it’s definitely worth the reward of liberation from the experience of sickness. I think this is much like some more serious matters. Owning up to my sin’s isn’t always the most fun thing in the world, and yet I always feel so free and contented after I go through that sometimes painful ordeal of recognizing my inadequacies and failures. Being vulnerable with others is similar; saying something totally honest to another person can be scary and unpleasant, but it’s so worth it in the end, and can lead to really great things in the end. In my class on conditioning and behaviour, there was much discussion of self-control, and individual’s tendencies to sometimes pursue a very small reward if it took less work than a greater reward. Ultimately, it’s unwise for individuals to work for such a limited gain, but they do this over and over. I’m certainly prone to the same behaviour. It’s all too tempting to avoid building relationships with people who aren’t necessarily the “coolest” or most fun, but I’ve found that these friendships can be so very worthwhile. I can be annoyed when the recipe I’m making is excessively complicated and disastrous, but the tastiness of the food is usually proportional to the (figurative) blood and sweat put into it. It can be easy to rush through my devotions on a hectic day, but those days can be the ones that I get the most out of my devos, Shortsightedness and a lack of self-control often rob me of truly gratifying experiences, whether the reward of a deepened friendship or the righting of my relationship with God.

In addition to being the month of Christmas, the anniversary of my birth, New Year’s Eve, family get-togethers, snow fun, and days without school, December brings with it celebration of music from the past year, and anticipation of music coming up. The Arcade Fire has named its upcoming album, and has made its first single available via phone, and The Shins already have their video out for “Phantom Limb.” Intelligent music and intelligent dialogue about music are truly splendid, and these things abound in this last month of the year. Pitchforks “Best of 2006” lists served as incentives to me while I studied this past week. Jess finishes classes as of Friday, and I can’t wait to monopolize her time with amusing activities and enjoyment of her silliness. Two weeks of movies, walks, talks, and dancing with Jay Jay is sure to be fun. Plus, I got her two presents yesterday that I’m certain both of us will enjoy over the holidays. Christmas with my family is always special, and in the past we’ve made efforts to help those around us in addition to giving each other gifts, whether by giving gift money to charities, sharing our festivities to people who were alone over Christmas, or simply giving some time to those in need. This year, my mom’s side of the family are having Christmas with four refugees from Afghanistan and Pakistan, for whom this will be their very first winter in Canada. My Auntie Laura and Uncle Doug have been very involved in them making it to Canada, and it should be neat to learn more about their lives and their background and share with them our Christmas traditions. Last year, Laura and Doug brought a group of Asian students to Christmas festivities, and that brought with it many amusements (never try any dessert containing black rice; you will sorely regret it). On my dad’s side, we’ll be celebrating the 25th with a woman who has terminal cancer and would otherwise be quite alone over Christmas. We met her at Thanksgiving this year, and my auntie, grandma, and grandpa have been a real blessing to her over the past few months. I feel privileged to spend time with her over the holidays; she’s a beautiful woman who’s gone through so much hardship in her life, and I have loads of respect for her. She even got me presents for my birthday, which was ridiculously sweet of her. I feel blessed that my family demonstrates the true meaning of Christmas each and every year; it’s easy to focus less on presents and Boxing Day sales when I see human compassion and kinship so clearly in my family. I hope one day to be a bit like them.



Symptoms of the Virus of Unpleasantness that I Will Self-Indulgently List

• dry skin
• runny nose
• sore throat
• coughing up of blood
• headache
• general fatigue
• strange delusions (as if there were normal delusions…)
• muscle pains
• sore lips
• vomiting
• no desire whatsoever to study for an EAS exam

P.S. Thank you to everyone who wished me happy birthday via e-mail, cards, phone calls, or simple person-to-person dialogue! You're all quite sweet, and definitely brightened my day. Also, if I've come off as cold, zoned out, or unlike myself in the past while, it was likely due to my crotchety reaction to being sick rather than any actual desire to be cold, zoned out, or unlike myself. (The flu makes a very excellent scapegoat, I have learned.)

Less than 100 Hours Until Freedom

This morning was one of those super foggy moments that are all too rare in Alberta. I love misty days. While mist does very strange things to my hair, and my sensitive eyes are somewhat irritated by the moist air, there’s something quite magnificent about everything around you being out of focus. It encourages introspection, and reminds me that God is all around me, just like the hazy vapour is. Good conversations with Him are almost certain on foggy days. One of my favourite composers is the film composer Thomas Newman, who’s done loads of beautifully soundtracked movies, and his music is the best supplement to the delicate cloud that hangs in the air on a day like today. His songs have these daintily fragile flourishes that make hair blowing in the wind and blurred figures in the distance appear as if they’re dancing to the music on my iPod. Songs like “Plastic Bag Theme” and “Possibility” make me want to dance, cry, and shout at the same time; only profoundly good music can do that. Jess and I sometimes sit in the living room in dim lighting and listen to some of his soundtracks, intermittently exclaiming how much we love dear Thomas, and feeling true contentment. Music is, at times, zealously enjoyed in my family. Back to my love of mistiness, I suspect that I also have a particular penchant for fog because it hearkens back to annual family vacations spent in the ever-so humid Vancouver and Vancouver Island. We used to hike to the lighthouse in Lighthouse Park every year, and the best walks were always the ones when the air was permeated in water vapour, and Jess and I could imagine how important we would be as lighthouse keepers, keeping the boats safe on even the murkiest of days. It’s partly in the mystery of everything being behind a permeable veil, too. You never know what exactly is behind that cloud in front of you, and it’s easy to ignore the ugliness of city surroundings when everything is shrouded by mist. One of the loveliest scene’s in Joe Wright’s version of Pride and Prejudice takes place in amidst billows of fog, and it not only makes for a dreamlike quality, but also represents how Lizzie and Mr. Darcy never quite recognized the potential loveliness that lay beneath the hazy ambiguity that characterized their relationship. Basically, fog is just really cool.

















I have decided that perhaps sociology isn’t quite so bad as I perceive it to be at times, although it remains in my mind as the least scientific academic field that masquerades as a science; I’m pretty sure that sociology is as scientific in its approach to learning about the social world as astrology is. It may sound nice to write about how society is purely two divided groups clashing with each other, or that society is a collection of groups that each serve their own complementary roles, but human behaviour is complex, messy, and at times seemingly inexplicable. There are very few overarching human tendencies, and to sit in an armchair and theorize about the workings of social interactions strikes me as slightly ludicrous. But sociology does serve a very important role in our society. Measuring cultural norms and trends within society is vital to our understanding of it, and while sociologists seem to exaggerate the significance of their seemingly obvious impressions of society, it is valuable to catalogue their findings. No matter how evident it is that children of divorced parents see their parents relatively less, or that more immigrants speak French in Québec than in Alberta, someone has to ensure that blatantly obvious social assumptions are, in fact, true. Still, the reasoning behind some of the theories to explain societal phenomena make me want to laugh and shake my head at the same time. However, as aforementioned, sociology redeemed itself slightly today. While I find psychology (in my completely unbiased opinion) to be far more scientific, precise, and pioneering, it is true that far more feminist rants can be indulged in when taking sociology courses. Today, I wrote 17 pages of what basically amounts to feminist vitriol, but because sociology profs have an innate appreciation of feminism, my exam actually made for some good Friday morning fun . Only English profs reward discussion of feminist thought just as much as my Dr. Kwame will.



Fortunately, the days of exam writing are very nearly finished with, and soon I will be inundated with birthday and Christmas presents. The highlights of my wish-list this year consist of a 30 GB iPod (I wanted the 60 GB, but it’s been deemed unnecessary by my parents), a tripod for my cameras, a functional Polaroid camera (mine seems to be pretty much useless at this point), records to spin on my oh-so-cool turntable, and a longboard for summer purposes. I’m pretty sure I’ll be getting at least one of the items on that list, and I’m rather certain that it’s the most exciting one featured in said list. I can’t wait to be free of studying. Although tonight is Friday, the day of freedom for watching movies, going out for dinner, and being wholly silly, I must confine myself to Starbucks armed with my Psych 381 textbook and a notebook. Really, studying on Friday is practically a criminal act, but school deems such a great sacrifice to be compulsory at times. Tomorrow will consist of a morning at the café, birthday celebration #1, studying, singing at the Christmas pageant, a Christmas fete at the girls’ house, and some more quality time spent with the writings of egotistical behavioural psychologists. Not bad, but I wish that I had time to waste this week. Tuesday really can’t come soon enough; I can make dopey videos with Jess, do Christmas shopping, bake, go tobogganing and skating, walk around in the snowy river valley, gear up for skiing trip 2007, write my Christmas cards, read for long periods of time, have movie marathons at home, and spend time with dear friends and family. I’m especially looking forward to Cranium; people outside of my family seem to have a limited appreciation of this game, so having relatives at hand to recount useless trivia and mimic Marlon Brando with is quite splendid.

On an extremely exciting note, awards season is just around the bend, and I’m pretty thrilled. I really will have to write the Brokeback/Crash blog over Christmas before the Oscar nominations come out, and I hope to see most of the likely nominees over the holidays. I’m especially excited to see Fast Food Nation; Filmspotting had nothing but praise for it, although the New Yorker review didn’t have quite the same reaction to it. Also, I had been completely unaware until now that Richard Simmons had vinyl records. I am so going to find a copy of one in a thrift store before winter term begins; I’m not sure how I’ve gone all my life without Richard Simmons vinyl. Plus, I need to do some back to school shopping at Goodwill and Value Village before a new set of classes are upon me. Next term, Andrew and I are also looking forward to starting up a newsletter (we’re negotiating templates for it when I’m back from skiing), and it should be a good outlet for the many fine writers and thinkers we have in the group. If any of you guys would like to write something up, feel free to tell me so, and we’d be happy to put your piece in the January issue. We’re currently brainstorming for titles, and we should have the first issue published before the winter retreat. There are plenty more things to update, but I’m a particularly lovely point in my book right now, and have spent far too much time in front of the computer screen. I’ll have to write something of actual significance in the next little while! Studying seems to make all other thoughts relatively shallow and lackluster, although I suppose I could blog about peak shift and fault lines if I were desperate for material. I hope your Christmas seasons thus far have been merry, despite involving far more studying and lack of sleep than is likely healthy!

All 25 Minutes of Grinchiness

The Christmas Spirit (Not the Charles Dickens Kind)

I believe that there is such a thing as the Christmas spirit. As the song goes, I do "hope that we could always see such spirit through the year," but there's something undeniably special about this, my favourite month in the calendar year. People do seem to count their blessings more than usual as we draw near to December 25, and the giving spirit that characterizes Christmas isn't limited to buying things for loved ones. On Saturday, I saw shoppers on Whyte Ave actually interacting with the homeless individuals who lined the shops, a sight which is all too rare. Customers at my café were patient and warm, and appreciative of some refuge from the bitter cold outside. People staffing the mall had hectic days, and yet gave us sincere wishes of a merry Christmas and danced along to some festive music. Yesterday, my dad attempted to replace a frozen flat tire of a girl's car near our house, and upon realizing that she'd need a tow truck, invited her to stay in our house and use the iMac and kitchen while she waited for help and we went off to my grandma and grandpa's for Sunday dinner. My auntie and uncle were shoveling my grandparents' walks when we arrived, and my grandma relayed warm wishes from a bunch of people from our old church from their service that day.

This season truly is beautiful, in some way that is distinguishable from the others. Whether it's the fact that we get some time off of work, the necessity for cooperation in this period of frigid cold and vehicle problems, or leftover giving from buying Christmas presents, it makes me smile to think that people do have it within them to love others wholeheartedly. The final scene in Monty Python's The Meaning of Life is the song "Christmas in Heaven," a song totally mocking televangelism and cliché notions of heaven (only watch it if you're certain you won't be offended!). Although I'm sure they didn't intend this, this song is one that also makes me wonder if this Christmas spirit that I witness around me foreshadows what it might be like when Jesus comes again. We give to charities the most at Christmastime, and seem to better understand the importance of showing love to others, especially friends and family. It's true that there is an increasingly materialistic aspect of Christmas. But the heart of Christmas, the celebration of Jesus' birth and its meaning in our lives, really does give me hope, peace, love, and joy. It's wonderful and hope-giving to witness at least a bit of these four elements of Advent in the people around me as well.

Fall Semester Wrap Up (Sans Technical Difficulties)

I must admit that I'm still quite tuckered out today. But it's a happy tired; the sort of fatigue that comes from fulfilling work and a day of adventures and memory-making. It was a non-stop day of work, shopping, brochure and DVD delivering, and watching the Liberal convention. The latter item on that list made the day rather splendid though, in addition to laughing and singing with friends at the banquet tonight, and getting the beach house in the Game of Life. While I may have earned very little money, ended up with a salary of $20,000, and had no children whatsoever, my love for Life remains unabated. On a real-life note, Dion is, I am certain, going to make a wonderful prime minister, and he's the sort of politician who strives to unify rather than divide. As he iterated today, the Conservatives aren't bad people; Conservative ways of bettering the country simply aren't ideal. I'm pretty excited for the likely upcoming election, and for our discussion in Poli Sci class on Monday. Seriously, anyone who names their dog Kyoto should automatically receive some sort of power. I'll have to write about the Liberal's future at another time though, because I still have to do my devotions and it's currently 1:40, and I need to get some zzzs before choir tomorrow. But remember, "tous ensemble!" (If you find this reference confusing, you really are missing out on political convention fun! I'll fill you in if you'd like.) Also, please admire how beautiful and lovely the drawing of Joseph Philippe Pierre Yves Elliott Trudeau is. It reminds me of a Wes Anderson movie, and is obviously a portrait of an excessively pretty person. If anyone could rock a comb-over, it was Trudeau.

I've Had Enough of Fatigue

I’m kind of exhausted today. It’s been a long week, and while there have been some really lovely moments in the midst of the hecticness, I’m relieved that I can start this next week afresh. My parents have been upset that I’ve been doing so much non-school stuff this week, especially with work, volunteering at Head Start, and C&C publicity stuff over the past while; it’s probably a valid concern. But it’s so terribly stressful when one’s parents are upset with one! There was a massive batch of items on a to-do list that I can officially check off as of this evening, and I feel like I can sigh a big breath of relief. It’s an awfully wonderful feeling, although I think I may need some decent sleep to overcome this fatigue. One of my favourite songs to listen to when I’m feeling pathetically sorry for myself is Michael Franti’s “Never Too Late,” which simply describes how you can always start fresh, and I’m quite thankful for that fact, in times as simple as the end of a long week, or as weighty as my sinfulness. There are a few things that I always do when I could use some cheering up, consisting of listening to music (today Zero 7), watching a good movie (tonight Love Actually with Jess), enjoying a warm drink (cocoa for this evening) and spending time with God (reading 1 Peter and The Jesus I Never Knew tonight). It’s pretty much a fail-safe recipe to snap out of my lethargy and notice all the little blessings. I shall make a list of these little blessings from tonight.



Little Blessings from Tonight

• channel 18 has the yule logs (!!!!)
• this year the yule logs come with crackling sound effects
• I am going to purchase the yule log DVD so I can watch it in bed at night (!!!!)
• snow has such a lovely crystalline glow
• the snow a warm tone of orange under the street lamps tonight
• Relevant Magazine is kind of my favourite magazine in the world
• the smoke stacks on campus are now lit up (so beautiful)
• tonight’s Filmspotting episode was simultaneously mentally stimulating and hilarious
• my computer is dreadfully pretty
• photos I took yesterday turned out decently
• my sunglasses are pretty much the coolest things ever
• tunnels and pedways are absolute lifesavers in cold weather
• I do not have frostbite like I thought I might (!!!!)
• there are an alarming number of doors that lead to absolutely nowhere on campus
• politics are increasingly exciting as we near Christmas
• Bob Rae’s chances of winning are steadily improving
• my chai latté today was the perfect temperature
• old beater cars are quite wonderful
• vats of pickles and ranch dressing at the guys’ house are amusing
• tomorrow I get to dress up (!!!!)
• I get to see Grandma and Grandpa and Anne and Tim on Sunday
• Pastor Lyle’s sermons top any Poli Sci lecture hands down (which is saying a lot!)
• Jess is pretending to be an electron tomorrow
• we saw Jess’ grad photos today; she’s a beautiful bumpkin
• I am done with the poor, abused Sniffy forever and ever
• Richard Simmons was on Letterman last night; it was amazing
  
• honeycombs are decidedly scrumptious
• the snow fort is coming along nicely
• there is now an acronym for the “super” in S.U.P.E.R. taster
• I’m reading Generation X right now, and I love Douglas Coupland

I was going to write about the shallowness of money, the nature of encouragement, and how splendid friends are, but the movie’s gotten to a particularly excellent scene, so I suspect that it’s best if I leave it at that. (I get emotional at very irrational points in Love Actually; I just got teary over seeing a speech about how terrible the States are. I must sleep tonight.) I’ll post a couple of movies that I edited tonight in lulls in the movie from leftover footage of New York, which I miss immensely. Two nights ago they lit up the tree at Rockefeller, the official beginning of the Christmas Season, and it was pretty fantastic. They even played “Jingle Bell Rock” to conclude, which is an exceedingly great song. Thus, I really am sorry that I’m not in NYC with pretty snow, wonderful Ella Fitzgerald music, bustling streets, and beautiful sights all around. But Edmonton does have all my loved ones, my Whyte Avenue, my river valley, and my Eskimos. I’ll stay here for now, I suppose. Also something I’m hoping to do soon is make the most of the snow. The moment that I’m free of exams, I’m having as many snowball fights, skating escapades, tobogganing adventures, and skiing trollops as possible. Tonight, though, is a night for some thinking, relaxing, and savouring the sensation of relief. I hope you’re all able to find some time for rest and renewal in the next while.



Things Completed this Week

• semester wrap-up video
• applied research proposal
• poster presentation
• Q&A outline for ABC Head Start
• Sniffy experiments
• research paper on peak shift
• earthquake location assignment
• finding a banquet skit
• my recent copy of The New Yorker
• Sociology readings
• organizing games closet
• learning choir songs
• cleaning the back room at work
• evaluation of volunteering
• composing my birthday/Christmas list
• the winter retreat brochure
• any traces of self-pity
  

P.S. I miss the summer and New York a bit.

Snow Certainly has Advantages

Tonight the foundations of this year's Lobe Snow Fort were laid, despite the snow's complete un-stickiness and our excessive hysteria over pouring water on our shoes and wearing silly clothes. Thus far, the major features of our lair include a table made out of a tree stump, short walls, an entrance, and a pretty radtacular floor. Previous forts have included windows, bench seats, and storage holes in the walls à la Fred Penner, so hopefully we'll get to incorporate some other architectural delights into the space as winter progresses. One of the very best things about having a fort in your lawn is that the floor makes a great spot to lie down on and observe the stars from, and it was fun to reminisce with Jess about star-gazing nights of the past. We've got our fingers crossed for more snow, since our main priority at this point in building is increasing the height and width of the walls. Snow adventures were followed by hot chocolate and a French movie with Mamushka and Diddy about a tax lawyer who poses as a psychiatrist (I napped through the latter moments of the film; building a fort is good hard work). That's really all I've got to say; I'm just excited by the prospect of improving our fort and spying on passersby.

P.S. Jess is seriously all I could ask for in a friend and sister. I love her oh-so very much.

P.P.S. I've found a new studying spot on campus, and it's superly duperly awesome. My dad used to take Jess and I there when we were really young, but I hadn't been there in ages, and I"m thrilled to have rediscovered it. It has all the essentials of a studying nook: a large window with a good view of campus, plenty of incoming sunlight, a comfortable seat, enough table space to study on, a healthy amount of peace and quiet, and enough room to bring friends along when desired.

Calling All Cameraphiles

I know for a fact that the people who check this blog once in a blue moon have awfully pretty faces, and I'm writing to offer you an opportunity to give that pretty face of yours some more exposure! I'm supposed to make a follow-up video to the awesome Mustard Seed event last weekend, and I'd love to interview you about your experience and what you got out of it. Optimistically, I'd like to get the footage mostly this weekend, so if there was a bit of time that you could set aside to give me a blurb about your time at the Mustard Seed, I'd appreciate it very much. I promise that appearing before Einstein the video camera will not take your soul away, and as the saying goes, any publicity is good publicity. Please give me a shout if you'd like to say a few words; otherwise I'll have to pester all you C&Cers into appearing on camera! In other church-related news, our Christmas choir is singing our first song this weekend in the first two services on Sunday. I'm immensely excited, especially because we're singing our favourite piece this Sunday, and my mom will be joining us on the piano with her accompanying "orchestra." Plus, I'm wearing a skirt to church to dress up for the occasion, and skirts are kind of fantastic. My final revelation to impart to you is that my feet are seemingly frostbitten after walking to ABC Head Start today. The kids still made the frostbite worth it, though. Children are the greatest.

Macs are Wonderful (from the C&C forum)

I love this ad. It makes me want to be the person who speaks up when it's akward, or does something that seems a bit strange and against the norm, just because it's the right or important thing to do. Computers really are superficial things, and approaching computers in an unconventional way isn't super revolutionary, but my love of Apples is often frowned upon by PC users. Especially people from church seem to strongly dislike Macs, as was indicated on our C&C forum today. Here was my feeble defence of my favourite computers of all... Anyone who is anti-Apple deserves their prosaic PCs with their hideousness, tendency to crash, and useless software. I am blessed to have grown up in an Apple family with Frank the Mac, Gandalf the iMac, Gimli the iBook, Arwen the MacBook, and Gazelda the eMac. Because of my wonderful heritage with Mac computers, I have evaded struggles with technology througout my lifetime, and have an unbreakable bond with my computers; my very first computer could not be parted with, so he sits in my closet. Macs are so wonderful and animated that they become a friend in a certain sense, and most users have a strong love for their computer. I know dozens of PC users who long to get a Mac, and more than a dozen converts from the awful PCs. Conversely, I have never in my life met a Mac user who wanted a PC, and have never heard of an Apple user who switched over to the PC world. In fact, Microsoft's rebuttal to Apple's "Switch to Mac" ad campaign was to have actors pretend that they had converted to PCs using the names of dead people. This is no joke. Is it a coincidence that Macs are so loved, even by people who don't use them? I think not.

Although my dad is really the Apple expert in our household, I can try to impart to all you Apple-ignorant folk the wonders of using a Mac. First off, Macs are simply easier to use. Everything is laid out in a highly logical manner, and the graphics and software are not only beautiful, but exceptionally lifelike. Because Apples are so well-designed, they are incredibly user friendly. My grandma learned how to use a computer in a single day at the tender age of 75 using my grandpa's new iMac; hitherto she had been unable learn how to use a PC. My dad convinced his school to get all Apple computers a few years ago, and the kids love how fun and accessible they are. Additionally, Macs do not crash. They never get viruses. Once they're plugged into an outlet, they're ready to go. They are faster than PCs. How can you beat that? Quite simply, you can't beat that, and Apple fans suffer far much stress due to computer issues and annoyances. My family has converted more than 15 families to Apples since I was born, and these switchers invariably notice the absence of hassles and struggles on their new computers. No longer must ctr+alt+del be used, and gone are the days of hesitating to trust e-mails due to the fear of viruses. Once a Mac is taken out of the box, given a power source, and turned on, life is markedly improved.

It's undeniable that Macs are gorgeous. When Bono described iPods as the sexiest thing since the electric guitar, he meant it. Apple products are carefully designed with both form and function in mind, which explains why Microsoft reliably copies Mac ideas. Mircosoft just now joined the Aqua bandwagon, while Apple has already moved onto a more progressive aesthetic. Why do almost all professional artists, filmmakers, musicians, photographers, and creative people in general use Macs? Because they appreciate beauty and are looking for a creativity-friendly computer. Apple employs zillions of design-savvy people to ensure the sleekness and prettiness of its hardware, and its operating systems are equally lovely. Macs really are adorable, and come in a variety of shapes and sizes, one of which would suit you, I'm certain. And if you really want a right-click mouse, you can totally buy them; Macs can easily be used with right-click mice, it's just that most Apple people don't like right-clicking, and prefer to use the "option" button when necessary. It's a matter of preference, but if for some reason you enjoy having another thing to click, you could have that. Yes it's true that Apple's PR team is awesome, but the attitude of wanting hiring creative and innovative people in PR is also applied to the engineers and designers who make the hardware.

I trust Steve Jobs far more than Bill Gates with my computer and various computer accessories. If any of my friends ever use a Mac as an anchor, I will cry. I really will. I must mention again that I'm unaware of a lot of computer things, and I know that Apples have several mother benefits that I have neglected to bring to your attention. If you still disagree with me, I would direct you to my dad, Apple indoctrinator extraordinaire. He has a much firmer grasp on alpha lock chips and RF modulators than I. (A friend responds with a reaction to my pro-Apple propoganda... Imagine arguments based on efficiency, children's opinions being insignificant, and a devaluation of objects' beauty. Typical PC.) I'm pretty sure that the naming of computers isn't unique to Mac users (a lot of people enjoy christening their PCs too), and I kind of enjoy naming things in general. It's rather fun! Apple users aren't quite members of a cult... A cult is defined by religious beliefs and a high degree of tension with the surrounding society combined with novel religious ideas. You could certainly say that Apple has a cult-like following, but many good things have so-called "cult-like followings," and Mac users are not pressured, manipulated with fear tactics, or brainwashed.

I know the comment about my grandma was a joke, and I suppose it is true that you could teach a chimp to use a computer, though it couldn't quite use spell-check or create computer programs. My grandma truly is exceptionally talented! She had the highest marks in the Faculty of Arts in university, and is a highly resourceful and intelligent person. She just doesn't find using a PC to be worthwhile because saving files into strange things called "My Computer" and having to avoid viruses is taxing at times. There really isn't anything infuriating about Macs! I'm not how using them would cause anger since they're much less counter-intuitive than PCs usually are. But maybe I'm so habituated to Apples that I just don't notice irritating things. Also, Macs really never crash; certain programs might freeze, but that program can be quit, and the computer doesn't have to be restarted. Maybe on extremely rare occasions the computer might fail somehow, but a computer honestly hasn't crashed in my house since Tiger came out. Not even once. My uncle got an iMac a year ago, and has completely avoided all crashes, viruses, and disappearing files since then. Prior to that, he got viruses on a regular basis, struggled with files being deleted, and was frequently aggravated by his computer crashing. I don't really think that these things were happening because he was too inept to use his computer.

As for viruses, it's true that part of the reason that Macs aren't targeted is because there are simply less Mac users to victimize. But another limiting factor is that Macs have a secure Unix base. This means that whenever the computer wants to do something suspicious, the user is warned in advance, and they can stop any damage from happening. So I suppose a virus could work if people agreed to let the virus do damage, but most would likely stop something strange happening to their Mac. My dad explains this much better. I really kind of like children, and tend to enjoy a great deal of the things that they like! Thus, I think it's neat that they too appreciate all that is fun, cool, and pretty in Macs, even though they might, like me, not quite understand everything about the computer that they're using. I think that they're opinion is pretty much as valid as anyone else's. although admittedly most Apple fans are adults. But we are all, I see, wayward children in error. As for this right-click business, as aforementioned, you can get a right-click mouse if you'd like! I find them to be a nuisance, but I know several Mac users who use them, and they work exactly as they do on a PC. So if you're aiming for efficiency, that can certainly be achieved with a Mac as well.

Just like children, Macs are really cute! They're rotund, shiny, and interesting. I don't want to say that someone's visual taste is superior to someone else's, because that would amount to complete snobbery. But it is true that people who make a living in the visual arts prefer Apple computers. I personally find Macs really beautiful, and I tend to appreciate a certain aesthetic a lot, and it's one reason why I enjoy these computers so much. I am kind of picky about things that furnish my bedroom, so I'll admit that whether my computer fits in with the rest of my furnishings or not is important to me. I've never in 20 years of life on this planet seen a PC that looked better than a Mac. Plus, Apple computers take up way less space than most PCs do. My dad truly isn't a cult enforcer! I was using hyperbole when characterizing him as an indoctrinator; he's only used violence and deceit a few times when discussing Apples with PC users (that too was sarcasm...). He's quite soft spoken and mild-mannered, but he enjoys using Macs for computer programming, video editing, word processing, and other day to day tasks involved in the to-do list of a computer teacher. Maybe it seems like Mac users are condescending when we defend our Apples so vehemently, but it's just that PC users really do miss out on a lot just because Macs aren't totally mainstream and widely accepted.




















I also don't know of any non-game programs that can't be run on a Mac. Like, at all. Most everything comes in a Mac version! As for games, if you really enjoy them, it's extremely simple to partition the computer with a gross Windows side for games etcetera. My cousins have done this, and it works very well, and they've yet to run out of space on either of the partitioned sides. So to reduce stress levels and improve performance in brain surgery, a Mac could certainly be used for games. The only thing I will categorically, without a doubt, totally disagree with you on is the thought that PCs are better for home-editing of photos, videos, and music. This is so insanely untrue! My family has recorded entire songs using a simple program on Garage Band, which any amateur music editor will admit is far superior to any such software available for PCs as well. As well, iPhoto and other Apple home-editing programs are noted as much easier to use, and more useful, in photo editing, just as Final Cut Pro and iMovie are regarded as superior to any PC software for video editing. I believe a few members of the AV Club at church would argue this better than I.

It's really quite easy to communicate between Macs and PCs, though I'm probably not the best person to explain how to integrate the two breeds of computer. But many businesses do this quite seamlessly! As for fiddling around with the inside of the computer, I know that various family members have done this, it's just less people would want to modify their Macs. Not sure precisely how this is done, and I'm sure you know more about that Matt (that rhymed!). But you definitely could change your Mac, especially with the tower Apples where the computer's designed to be change-friendly. Finally, kids are so not stupid! Their propensity for creativity, inadvertent humour, and clever insight repeatedly amazes me. They might think differently from those more advanced in years, and may be at a different place cognitively, but they certainly have valuable and interesting thoughts. Children are some of my favourite people in the world, if not my very favourite. Any further qualms with my love of Apple and Steve Jobs can be directed towards my comments section. I'm rather passionate about computers, and will likely respond with some attempt at a reasonable response. After all, once an Apple user, always an Apple user! (In an un-cult-like way, of course.)

Apple's Reasons to Switch to a Mac

• It just works. How much time have you spent troubleshooting your PC? Imagine a computer designed by people who hate to waste time as much as you do. Where all the hardware and software just works, and works well together. Get a Mac and get your life back.
• You can make amazing stuff. Every Mac comes with iLife ’06, a suite of software that transforms your photos, music, and video into all kinds of projects. Make high-quality websites, photo books, DVDs, songs, slideshows, music CDs, calendars, cards, prints, podcasts, music videos, documentaries, and more.
• Design that turns heads. You won’t want to hide your Mac in a corner of the den. You’ll want it front and center in your life. The Apple style shows in every detail, from its sculpted surfaces to its gorgeous Mac OS X graphics.
• 114,000 Viruses? Not on a Mac. Mac OS X was designed with security in mind. Windows just wasn’t built to bear the onslaught of attacks it suffers every day. A Mac offers a built-in firewall, doesn’t advertise its existence on the Net, and isn’t compromised within an hour of being turned on.
• Next year’s OS today. Since Mac OS X engineers aren’t busy damming a flood of viruses, they have the time to think up amazing new technology. Like Dashboard widgets, mini-applications offering a world of capabilities just a keystroke away. Or a built-in RSS news reader.
• The latest Intel chips. Intel Core Duo processors put you on the cutting edge. In fact, a Mac with an Intel chip is so fast it surprises even longtime Windows pundits, who keep running benchmarks again and again. Results? Fast. Fast. Yup, still fast.
• Instant video chats. Setting up a video chat with the people next door — or across the globe — should be as simple as picking up the phone. On a Mac, you just click an icon to have a four-way video chat in a full-screen window with amazing clarity and special effects.

• More fun with photos. On a Mac, you don’t need any extra software to make a photo book. You don’t have to leave your photo software to visit a separate website and wait for forms to load. All you need is a camera and a Mac.
• One-click websites. How long does it take to post a photo or video to your blog on a PC? On a Mac, you can shoot a picture or a movie with the built-in camera, then post it on the web in a few clicks. Pontificate, preachify, and publish. The hardest part is coming up with something to say.
• Amazing podcasts. Want to get your message out to the world? Podcast it. A Mac makes it simple to create professional podcasts, complete with artwork. Add sound effects and jingles, even use the built-in radio engineer to make it perfect. So you can be a talk star in seconds.
• Rock star tunemaking. Musicians get all the girls (or guys). And a Mac has the software to turn you into the musician of your dreams. Choose from hundreds of cool riffs and instruments to create your own songs. Get good enough and you could be on iTunes.
• Hollywood-style movies. Connect your DV camera and turn your movies into spectaculars. Add graphics, titles, and sound effects in minutes. Then use your Mac to burn a DVD or post to your website.
• No hunting for drivers. Just plug in your stuff. A Mac includes USB drivers for mass storage, digital cameras, input devices, iPod, and more. It can see Bluetooth cell phones and headsets, as well as FireWire cameras. No rebooting.
• Awesome out of the box. Other computers include software, it’s true. But once you start using that software, you find that you’re hobbled in some way or another. Software included with the Mac, on the other hand, is critically acclaimed as best in class.

This photo was taken in the Museum of Modern Art in New York, one of my very favourite places in the city. It is largely regarded by artists as the premiere display of modern art on the face of the planet, and features the greatest artists in the world. Here are three Apple products in a one-room exhibit on modern design. There were no PCs in the exhibit at all. I know this is art snobbery, but you can't deny that Macs are not just cute, they're gorgeous. They're art.

I am Stricken with Jambalaya Food Poisoning

I fell prey to a mild bout of food poisoning tonight, and while Crystal is skeptical of my ailment, I really do feel slightly delirious at the moment. And yes, I've been sick tonight. Jess is now in bed, and I've read enough today, so I'm passing the time by typing. I was chatting with a customer recently who was formerly a court typer, and I discovered that she typed at a speed of 125 wpm, which strikes me as entirely insane. So I'll type my thoughts out as they come, provided that they don't come out at more than 70 wpm. Yesterday I made two very significant discoveries, both of which I shall relate here. First off, while ordering a soup combo from the lovely manager of my favourite Timmy Ho's, it came to my attention that instead of a single donut in a combo, one could receive two cookies instead. Two cookies! A soup, roll, non-Coke beverage, and two whole triple chocolate cookies make for a pretty great meal, all for the very low price of $4.48. While the lineups at Tim Horton's are at times laughably horrid, it's hard to beat such a steal of a deal (especially when there are macadamia nut and triple chocolate cookies to be consumed). I suspect that Crystal was really not a fan of me taking about 15 minutes to get my food yesterday, but it was almost worth her semi-masked grumpiness.

In addition to this marvelous food revelation yesterday, I was introduced to creamy dill ripple chips at my family's Grey Cup party last night. Dill chips are on my top five list of best chip flavours of all, but it would seem that creamy dill may have moved into first place. I took the leftovers home, and promptly finished them last night. I even found out via my super-fab uncle that there are Izzle Pops in this very city! Prior to last night, I believe that I had finished my very last Izzle Pop ever in NYC (you really must all try the many varieties of Izzle Pops). I am so thankful that God created our hundreds of taste buds, and that I am among the 600,000 super-tasters on this planet. Goodness I'm being self-indulgent tonight; I've drawn attention to the fact that I'm feeling under the weather, and have mentioned my superior tasting abilities. I am a pretty super taster though, it's undeniable. (Not a pretty super taster, a pretty-super taster.) I hope you all had a great deal of fun at your Grey Cup parties (I'm assuming you all watched the game, because otherwise it would be a tragedy of epic proportions). I missed the first half due to choir practice, and ended up cheering for the Als with my family in the second half because they were down by so much; our cheering almost allowed them to make a full comeback. It was, as one would predict, an awesome night of sports and giggling with family over a lovely meal. My only qualm is that Cahoon should have been outstanding Canadian player, since McCallum only really stood out because the B.C. offence was unable to finish a lot of their drives. Plus, Ben Cahoon has a pretty excellent smile. Perhaps this will make up for the manure incident in Saskatchewan, though.


Anyways, now that we have my rather meaningless thoughts out of the way, onto things of substance that have been circulating through my mind recently. I'm currently in the middle of deciding whether or not to head off to the Dominican Republic this spring with some fellow C&Cers over reading week for a missions trip. I am terribly conflicted over this decision, since my parents are wary of me spending a pretty large sum of money in the middle of a term where I'm working only twice a week. It is a sizable amount of cash, yes, but I know that it would be such a great experience, and that it would mean a deepening of my relationships with both God and the others in the group. The opportunity to lend a hand in a poverty-stricken country is hard to pass up, and it's likely one of the most convenient times in my life to do something like this. This term I've been toying with sponsoring my own Compassion child, since my family's really loved having our little Juan, but I don't know how feasible it would be for me to sponsor a child now if I need money go away. Not that I couldn't cut back on silly expenses and eating out, but I imagine it would be tricky. I've been back and forth for a week, and I'm still not sure what to do. I suppose that means more prayer then! Also on the topic of getting away from Edmonton is my family's annual Christmas skiing trip. We usually ski only one day downhill and one day cross-country, but it's nearly always one of the highlights of my year. I must inform you that I am one of the worst skiers in the world. I'm exceptionally afraid of crashing into another skier, and as a result, if I feel as though I might hit anyone, I stop and sit on the ground for a moment. Additionally, I dislike feeling out of control, and am usually the last one in the family lineup of skiers. There's something so peaceful and invigorating about the snowy mountains though, and I'm incredibly excited for the trip down to Banff in about a month. This will inevitably mean dinner at Coyote's, walks around town with Starbucks hot chocolates, and plenty of giddy fun. Yay for family skiing trips!


It's always so cool to find good where you didn't expect to find it. Pastor Lyle spoke about Paul yesterday, one of my top 10 Bible characters (it's kind of strange that we call them Bible characters; we don't call people in history books characters). Anyways, I digress; Paul's one of my favourite people in the Bible partly because his journey to Christ is the story of someone who was seemingly helpless to change made such a dramatic transformation. I find hope in the thought that anyone I know could experience this kind of change, no matter how far gone or out of reach they might seem. Paul was acting horrifically towards Christians prior to his conversion, and yet God used him for so many great things after he literally saw the light. Indeed, Lyle mentioned how Saul likely had experienced a feeling of "kicking at the goads," and there seemed to be something in him telling him that there was something more. Sometimes I find it difficult to imagine some people even considering God in their lives, but from Scripture like this I suspect that everyone does have moments where there's a sense that there is this God who they rely on. To some extent, this is why I think the death penalty isn't ours to enforce; who knows if Saddam Hussein could have changed his life around, or if he's contemplated whether Christians were onto something. If Paul made such a massive change, I believe that anyone can, and to basically condemn people when they commit heinous crimes strikes me as tragic.

My devotions led me to 1 Peter today, a letter written by someone who also was used by God despite some bumps along his journey. It would be no small thing to deny Christ three times, but Peter eventually matured into someone who led the church in its early years and was such an encouragement to downtrodden Christians. I find that so hopeful. I think I have to fight any cynicism developing in me as a get older, because there's no reason to be a cynic, and I want to always know the hope of Christ. I was reading through Song of Songs last week, and I was skeptical enough to believe that I wouldn't get as much out of that book as I do out of others. But reading what C.H. Spurgeon, William Reese, and T.S. Eliot wrote about the romance between Christ and the church really brought a new light to the text, and I got so much out of reading that sometimes-amusing love poetry. Yet again, my skepticism was nulled, and it became clearer than I ever that I need to steer clear of cynicism in my life. Yes, I believe that thinking critically is vital to a healthy faith, and that there's so much that I want to change in the world, but without hope I don't have much to strive for.

Reasons this Blog May be Nonsensical

• my coherence has been limited this evening
• I am sick
• it is late
• Crystal made me stare at ugly hair tonight

Learning from the Less Fortunate

I’m surprisingly content at the moment. I’ve had a rather busy week, barely finished my poster project that was due today, and I’m exhausted after a long day. But God is good, and I feel blessed to know Him tonight. I tagged along with a group of C&Cers tonight as we served at the Mustard Seed, and while it was anything but an organized affair, it’s such a pleasure to sit down and talk with a group of people who come from such brutal situations, but are so thankful and honest. Some of my most treasured conversations in life have been with homeless people. I once talked with a man on the LRT the entire train line about his alcoholism and blindness, and was struck simultaneously by his heartbreaking life, and his strong sense of curiousity and awe at everything around him. My very favourite Our Voice vendor on Whyte Ave dressed up as Santa Claus one year and handed out Hershey’s kisses to the passersby who had so much more than he. It was such a beautiful image, one that echoed of Jesus’ selfless love; this man gave when it was us who should have been giving to him. One of my best customers at the café is Mike, a wonderful fellow without a home who barely scrapes by. Most days, Mike brings the change that he has begged for into the café and we happily exchange his coins for five-dollar bills. But instead of keeping the leftover change, Mike always contributes it to our tip jar. Here is a man who barely has enough to get a hot dog from 7-11 for lunch, and wears completely destroyed shoes, and yet he loves us girls and cares as much about us as we do for him. Mike has given me so much more than his extra change; he’s given me a picture of true selflessness and immaterialism.


There is so much to learn from the impoverished men and women in our city, and any opportunity to interact with this oft-misunderstood group of people should be cherished. Yes, a lot of people in poverty have issues with drugs. Yes, many homeless people rifle through garbage cans and pester people for money. Yes, many of the poor are in that position because they struggle to hold down jobs or find work. But God never asked us to love people who were drug-free, kept to themselves, and were motivated members of society, and Jesus didn’t qualify his instructions to the rich man to sell all he had and give it away. God just wants us to love, and Jesus just instructed the man to give his belongings away. In a certain way, that’s incredibly empowering. Not to say that giving the boisterous man on the corner of 109th is the solution to poverty, but listening to these people’s stories, sharing the cookie you just got at Subway, or offering some bit of encouragement goes a long way. It’s late, and Jess is away for the weekend, and I’m feeling delirious, but those are the thoughts I felt like getting out at 2:30 AM. On a completely unrelated tangent, I've burned the Christmas CDs and they're now free for the taking. If I've already given you yours, I hope it's getting you into a wintry mood! In conclusion, this makes me happy.

Music I'm Loving

• Nouvelle Vague
• Kings of Convenience
• Mogwai
• Ray LaMontagne
• As Tall as Lions
• Andrew Bird
• Jon Brion
  
• anything Christmas-y

Places I'm Loving

• Steeps (preferably with friends)
• the snow path in Corbett Field
• my ABC Head Start classroom (the kids are sooo great)
  
• Mustard Seed
• my bed, under the covers
• the Psychology entrance to Bio Sci
• the rocking chair in the living room by the window

People I'm Missing this Weekend

• Jess (having a blast at Camp Caroline)
• C&Cers who I'll miss on Saturday
  
• Colleen and Kristin from work
• Bethany

P.S. You'd all better be watching the Grey Cup on Sunday. It's a wonderful excuse to eat loads of food, mock Don Matthews, scream loudly, and hang out with friends and family. I'd really wanted to have friends over for a party this year, but choir is practicing at 4:00 this Sunday due to the youth retreat, so the girls of the family will be catching the second half at my auntie and uncle's party. I'm super duper thrilled, especially because I know that the Als are going down. If you think that I scream loudly, you should hear my mom when the team we're cheering for scores a TD; her shrieking is renowned for both its amusing sound and remarkable loudness.

P.P.S. I nearly referred to Don Matthews as Dave Matthews. That's how out of it I am.

P.P.P.S. Exactly one month. Until my birthday.

I Wish I Was French...

'Tis the Season

Today my parents put our white Christmas lights up on our ornamental crabapple tree. For those of you who live in Edmonton, the result of this decoration is a Whyte Ave tree wannabe; a wonderful, yet simple, ode to the prettiness of snowflakes and city lights. I love how we illuminate various plants at this time of year, whether to signify the Star of Bethlehem, or to liven up the bleak landscape of snowy white. November and December are two of my favourite months. I'm not anywhere near being weary of the cold until January, and the compulsory time spent indoors often results in compulsory time spent with loved ones. I am enamoured with Christmas music; songs that feature hand bells, pertain to Jesus’ birth, explore the hopeful side of humanity, and make pop stars sound actually pleasant make me want to dance and cry simultaneously. Whenever I am deeply saddened by something, I listen to Christmas music. Of course, this is in part because music from this season of our calendar year reminds me of such beautiful memories. Memories of silly presents bestowed upon me for my birthday, and Christmas a week later, images of family laughing heartily, and reminiscence of things God has taught me over the twenty Advent seasons I’ve lived through. I enjoy how our buzzing society slows down for a short while amidst the arctic conditions, allowing for recognition of a momentous occasion. I am encouraged by the fact that I have plentiful opportunities at this time of year to discuss my faith with friends who might not quite understand the magnitude of Jesus’ birth. Choir recitals, A Christmas Carol readings, baking Christmas cookies, Stuart McLean stories, putting radioactive raspberries in my uncle's trifle, listening to The Gift of the Magi at suppertime, drinking real apple cider, seeing rarely seen relatives, wearing layers of sweaters, watching old movies in the basement. These things make my heart brim with joy.

It's difficult to savour this season in the midst of midterms, assignments, and the plethora of other engagements we might find ourselves in. But it's so worth it to take some time out to enjoy the view from your window, or really listen to the sound of shoes crunching through the snow. Just as spring is a time of newness, so too is winter. All the ugliness of road grime and dying grass is submerged in a shroud of snow, and it always feels easier, to me at least, to renew myself in these months. I have complete anonymity when walking outside swathed in scarves and hats, and it feels easier to decide for myself who I want, and am going, to be. Winter months are sometimes months of isolation. Jaunting off to meet someone takes more planning and time, and walks outside are for more solitary. This is healthy, I think. In seclusion, truth is often more evident, or perhaps glaring.

I’m writing a paper right now for Poli Sci, which is incredibly exciting. I love papers beyond belief, but rarely have reason to write them. However, this semester, I actually have an assigned essay, and I’m currently researching it with great excitement. Canadian politics delight me a bit too much I suspect. Also, this past week my dad and my sister have been busy dreaming up ways to use our new robot Gollum which was given to my dad for his birthday. It’s basically a bunch of parts with several sensors (light sensor, colour sensor, ultrasonic sensor, sound sensor, etcetera) and motors that allow it to be a rather sophisticated robot, if you choose to put some time and energy into it. Christmas promises to be a time of much robot trial and error (their current project is teaching Gollum to get to the main floor bathroom from environmental cues). I’m additionally about to purchase some winter shoes, which I have not done in quite some time. Really, the fact that I have gone without the buying of shoes for such an extended period of time truly deserves recognition of some sort. I am only half the shoe-consumer I could be, which isn’t really saying much I suppose. But I am thinking of getting some Campers, especially after being so enchanted by the Camper store in SoHo. To conclude, dear readers, I will remind you that American midterm elections are coming up. And George Bush might have reason to blush come Wednesday morning. My sadistic pleasure in Republican struggles is quite reliable.

Noteworthy Quotes from The Little Prince

"Nothing's perfect," sighed the fox. "My life is monotonous. I hunt chickens; people hunt me. All chickens are just alike, and all men are just alike. So I'm rather bored. But if you tame me, my life will be filled with sunshine. I'll know the sound of footsteps that will be different from all the rest. Other footsteps send me back underground. Yours will call me out of my burrow like music. And then, look! You see the wheat fields over there? I don't eat bread. For me, wheat is no use whatever. Wheat fields say nothing to me. Which is sad. But you have hair the color of gold. So it will be wonderful, once you've tamed me! The wheat, which is golden, will remind me of you. And I'll love the sound of the wind in the wheat..."

"One sees clearly only with the heart. Anything essential is invisible to the eyes."

"For millions of years flowers have been producing thorns. For millions of years sheep have been eating them all the same. And it's not serious, trying to understand why flowers go to such trouble produce thorns that are good for nothing? It's not important, the war between the sheep and the flowers?... Suppose I happen to know a unique flower, one that exists nowhere in the world except on my planet, one that a little sheep can wipe out in a single bite one morning, just like that, even without realizing what he's doing - that isn't important? If someone loves a flower of which just one example exists among all the millions and millions of stars, that's enough to make him happy when he looks at the stars. He tells himself, 'My flower's up there somewhere...' But if the sheep eats the flower, then for him it's as if, suddenly, all the stars went out. And that isn't important?'"

"That is the hardest thing of all. It is much harder to judge yourself than to judge others. If you succeed in judging yourself, it's because you're truly a wise man."

Cait's Daily Checklist

• read
• devos
• dance
• walk outside
• pray to music
• eat fruits and veggies
• clean thoroughly
• do e-mailing nonsense
• brush teeth twice
• shower
• do something sweet for family and friends
• drink water and milk
• be kind to a stranger
• write in notebook
• talk to a non-Christian friend about God's goodness
• talk to a Christian friend about God's goodness
• check up on the news
• find a new thing to be happy about
• read about the arts
• be selfless, at least for one moment
• say the words "i love you"
• laugh
  
• worship God

Songs with Thoughtful Lyrics

• First Day of My Life
• Better Together
• Do You Realize
• The Rest of My Life
• Jesus the Mexican Boy
• Your Ex-Lover is Dead
• Oh God Where are You Now
• Losing Haringey
• Hallelujah
• St. Patrick's Day
• Delicate
• Under the Weather
• I Melt with You
• Be Kind and Remind
• Casimir Pulaski Day
• Muzzle of Bees

Sign Up for the Service Project

Reasons to Sign Up

• it will be fun
• you can learn from the different perspective of struggling Edmontonians
• it's an opportunity to make the most of your time
• the Mustard Seed is a vital organization
  
• it will make a difference
• it's Biblical
  
• homeless people are really, really cool
• it's the C&C event for that weekend
  
• it's what all the cool kids are doing